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Men freaked me out.’ She actually chuckled. ‘It worked. I relived it and understood my victimhood and the particularity of the man.’ She shuddered. ‘He was no longer every man.’ Consuela looked up at Joe. ‘I still feel more comfortable in the arms of women. You know Annie was once my lover?’ Joe nodded. ‘Sometimes I get tight again and I self-medicate in a way hypnotizing myself. It’s a meditative process.’ ‘Could you hypnotize me?’ Joe asked. ‘I’m no doctor,’ Consuela objected. ‘I could do more harm than good.’ ‘Let Maya and Carol know. They can help restrain me if I get wild and crazy, bring out the net and send me to the loony bin.’ ‘I don’t think you’ll get violent, but you could actually go nuts.’ She paused and smiled. ‘You know I’m attracted to you.’ ‘I am too, which is weird since I’m fully satisfied by two incredible women.’ ‘I think that’s why I allowed the attraction. I knew you didn’t need to…have me.’ ‘I’m safe.’ ‘In a way. You’re awfully tall and I can tell you’re. She'd accepted me instantly, just like Michelle had done. Perhaps some day, I'd see or hear about her. By then too I figured, the little residual negative feelings I had about June, would be gone.I know now when she left it was true sadness she was expressing. Like I've already mentioned, I realize that must have been a difficult decision for her. Katie was quite confused but accepted the fact she was going to go live with her dad.I'd missed both of them as I rearranged my solo life. I didn't want another loss in my life like that again so I'd shut down. I'd had a few short term relationships after June but I never let them get serious.Sure I'd had some sex with a few of my dates along the way but back then I'd known if I'd allowed myself to commit to anyone else, how devastated I would be if they hit me with another breakup. I just never really allowed myself to get close to anyone after June.Also, seeing what had happened with June, you know, Katie, I always wore protection. I.
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